FMA Meets Naruto
by Gaara's Desert Rose-Hasame
Summary: [One shot]Hilarious one shot I thought of at one in the morning and after i got huigh on Febreze once again, HasameXEnvy


HEY! Another one shot..this ones intersting...When the characters from Fullmetal Alchemist meet the Characters from Naruto! How will this turn out? and it might be long, so forgive me if u get bored by it by the middle part so. if u have great concentration, hope u read all of it! This is written after the Whispers in the Trees one shot, with me and Envy. so...yea... READ AN ENJOY! plz dont point out my spelling errors, if i make any. i fuckin suck at spelling. and everyone here will be out of character ok? ill try and keep at least a bit of their character in it, but not by much. And i wrote this at like midnight, so im fuckin tired, and my brains not working properly, and i dont know what i was thinking when i worte this. I just thought it sounded funny.

FMA Meets NARUTO

Two people where walking in a park, empty except for a boy with black hair sitting on a swing. The pair sat down under a tree, holding hands, the red haired girl would laugh occasionally. She snuggled up to the male she was with, who had long spikes of green hair.

"Weird." thought the boy glaring at the couple who had intruded upon his quiet swing. He stopped and sat there, still. His black eyebrows raised up into his metal headband with the symbol of a leaf on it. The girl looked familiar to him. He frowned and turned around on his swing when he thought he heard a voice calling his name.

"Sasuke-kun! Sasuke-kun! May I join you, please?" called a girl with short pink hair, running towards him and waving her left arm in the air in hello.

The red haired girl looked up at the voice, and noticed the boy and girl on the swing set.

She frowned in thought.

"What's wrong Hasame?" Asked the green-haired male, looking over at his lover.

"I...know that girl...and the boy...no it cant be..." Hasame squinted.

" Ha ha ha! Hey sakura-chan! Hey sasuke! What's up!" yelled a blonde haired boy with the same headband as the two on the swings.

" Oh...hey Naruto." said Sakura dully, pumping her legs, and rose higher in the air on her swing.

"Hey loser." Sasuke said, glaring at Naruto.

"Dont call me that!" Naruto glared back.

"Dont fight you two. lets just enjoy ourselves for god's sake!" complained Sakura, her pink hair flying around her face.

"OMG! Sakura! Sasuke? Naruto? Is it really you?" Hasame rose from Envy's lap in surprise and played with the ends of her red hair. She hadn't seen them in nearly two years.

The three looked around at her.

" HASAME-CHAN!" cried Naruto loudly, and flew off his swing and ran towards her, and crushed her in a hug.

"WHOA! Ok hey! My god you've gotten taller!" Laughed Hasame and hugged the blonde back.

Envy stood up and cocked an eyebrow at the boy hugging his girl.

"Hasame, whos this?" he asked, wrapping an arm protectivly around Hasame's waist after Naruto let go.

Sakura and Sasuke came over and Sakura gasped when she saw the red head.

"Hasame! I haven't seen you in sooo long!" Sakura bounced up and down then stopped when she saw the green haired man holding Hasame.

"Oh, i suppose i should intoruce you. Sasuke! You coming over here today or what?" laughed the red head, waving an arm.

Boredly, Sasuke half-heartedly waved his hand, walked over and stood beside Sakura and Naruto.

"Ok, Envy, this is Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto! Guys, this is Envy." introduced Hasame to each other.

Suddenly, there was yelling heard across from the park, and a giant suit of armor and a short blonde boy were running across the grass at breakneck speed, dodging flames that licked at their heels.

"HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!" yelled the blonde, jumping high in the air to dodge fire that erupted from under his rear.

"NII-SAN! MAYBE THAT WASNT THE GREATEST IDEA!" called the armor, his arms above his head.

A man with black hair and dark blue uniform was running after them and snapping his gloved fingers furiously. Hasame squinted and noticed that there was marker designs on his face.

"FULLMETAL! YOUR GONNA PAY FOR THIS!" he yelled.

Edward was running towards Hasame and the group and jumped into the tree, the armor on the other hand couldn't and resorted to hiding behind the tree,

"Nii-chan! help us!" cried Alphonse, cowering.

"WHAT DID YOU DO NOW!" yelled Hasame furiously at Edward in the tree, whos face was covered in soot.

He started laughing.

"Drew on his face." he answered simply.

Hasame turned just in time before Roy Mustang collided with her.

"Whoa whoa! Hold on there" said Hasame, crawling out from under Roy's fallen body. The Colonel sprang to his feet and was about to snap his fingers at the cornered two when he noticed Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto staring at him in amazement and awe.

"Uh...Whisper, who are these?" he asked, saluting Hasame. Hasame saluted back. She glanced over at her friends and they still stood there, frozen.

"Wow...THAT WAS AMAZING How do you do that?" hollared Naruto, pumping his fist in the air.

This time, it was Roy, Edward and Alphonse to gape in wonder at the loud blonde boy in front of them.

Sakura's eyes widened and she grinned.

' That was freakin awesome! How could he do that without any hand seals?' cried her inner Sakura.

Sasuke did no reaction whatsoever.

"What the hell is going on?" asked Edward, still clinging to the tree branch. Alphonse poked his head out from behind the tree trunk.

"Hasame? Care to explain?" demanded Roy, standing straight as a board as always.

"Ok, everyone. This is Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura. you three? you already know Envy, this is Roy Mustang, the Colonel, Edward and Alphonse Elric, my brothers. We are state alchemists." Sighed Hasame, as she explained again.

"Achle-what?" said Naruto, a dumb look on his face.

"Alchemy, idiot." said Sasuke, crossing his arms over his chest, not liking the scene before him.

"What's alchemy? And how'd he make fire with out any hand seals?" Asked Sakura timidly, slightly intimidated at Roy.

'OMG he's hot!' cheered her inner Sakura, waving her arms about excitedly.

"Hand seals? What the hell is that?" Envy said, pulling Hasame closer.

"HEy! You get your hands off my sister!" Commanded Edward and jumped out of the tree, landing solidly on his feet.

"I can do whatever I want, Fullmetal Shorty." retorted Envy, planting his fists on his hips and glowered at the short blonde.

"WHO YOU CALLING A SUPER HYPER BEAN THAT YOU WANT TO STEP ON HIM!" Edward freaked out.

"He didnt go that far, nii-san" said Alphonse, sighing at his brother's uncoolness.

There was yelling coming across from the park, and the troup turned around to see a woman with four spiky ponytails and a fan on ehr back with a short dress on, running away from a man with black pants and a vest on, chasing her.

"Aw come on, baby! Come to our pub. You know you'll like it!" He called, shrugging his shoulders.

"GO AWAY, YOU PERVERT!" Screamed the blonde woman, pulled the fan off her back and swung in the direction of the man following her. Instantly, his skin turned all blue and he wasnt even effected by the blow.

"WHAT THAT HELL ARE YOU!" screeched the blonde and spotted Hasame.

"HASAME! OMG, OK HELP ME HERE! THIS BASTARD WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE!" called the woman and ran towards the red head, glancing back at the man.

"Hey Temari! Ok, one sec! I know him! Edward, you helping me?" said Hasame, pulling away from Envy.

"Aw, not him. Greed is just trying to get her to go with him. Leave them alone, their not our problem." Envy whined and rubbed the back of his spiky greed head.

Temari panted and slowed down, halted near Hasame. She leaned on her fan to stay stable as she regained her breath.

Looking around, she saw the three Konoha ninja.

"Hey, its the loud boy." she commented to Naruto, and saw Edward, Alphonse and Roy.

"O...k..who are they?" she asked, then squealed when she saw Greed drawing closer towards them.

"He wont stop following me! That fuckin perverted bastard!" she whined and drew her fan again.

"No matter what i do, he wont get hurt! Damn it!"

Greed frowned and halted at the group.

"Envy? Whats going on? Who are these guys?" Greed stuck a thumb out at the three ninja who were beside Temari.

Hasame fumed. She hated having to repeat herself more than once. She grabbed her hair in frustration, then suddenly turned around and jabbed a finger at Edward.

"Ed! YOU explain!" she commanded and plopped herself down at the base of the tree.

After Edward did the introduction, with some help from Hasame with the names, Roy was raising an eyebrow at Temari, who blushed slightly, but stood tall.

Hasame looked around at the strange group. Four people with forehead protectors and the other four were either Alchemists or one of the seven deadly sins. Interesting.

Envy sat down beside her and tucked her and his hand behind Hasame's back, knowing she was shy when it came to PDA. (Public Displays of Affection)

Two women were wandering into the park, one with a dark kimono top and the other with a green coat, the kenji "Gamble" on the back of it. The woman with black hair was holding a pig in her arms, and the other had long blond pigtails flowing down her back.

Hasame's mouth dropped open. Why was the Godaime here?

The pig in the black haired woman's arms raised it's nose in the air and oinked, dropping from it's owners arms. The little pig ran towards Hasame and jumped into her lap, oinking happily.

"Oh Ton Ton! It's so good to see you!" cooed the red head, letting the pig sniff her hair and face, pushing his snout in her ear.

"A pig? God, what next?" mumbled Envy, throwing his hands in the air.

The two women followed Ton Ton and the black haired woman gasped.

"Hasame? Is that you? Oh my! How are you!" she squealed and hugged the girl.

"Shizune! Im doing great!" she laughed and hugged her back, the pig ending up being squished between the females'...ahem. You know.

"Oops, sorry Ton ton." apologized Shizune, picking up the pig and cradling him in her arms. The 5th Hokage stood over Hasame. The red head quickly rose to her feet and bowed respectivly. The blonde woman just stood there, arms crossed, an impatient look on her features.

"Where...have...you...BEEN!" the older woman yelled at the girl, who cringed.

"You left us without a word for almost 2 years! Understand that? TWO WHOLE YEARS! And then you come back with...er..who are they? Oh never mind. You couldn't at least sent a letter or something! I thought of putting you as a missing nin! And I certainly didn't want to do that! So, Kakashi and all the other jounin were searching for you for almost a year! And--"

"OK! WHAT THE HELL'S YOUR PROBLEM WOMAN! WHO ARE YOU TO SCREECH AT HASAME LIKE THAT?" hollared Edward, jumping in front of the blonde buxomic female, coming very close to her large chest. He recoiled and glowered up into her blue eyes. Looking over the short blond's head, she stared at Hasame for a long time. Her face cracked and she split into a smile, pushing Edward out of the way and crushed Hasame in a hug.

"Ooooooh Hasame! We missed you soo much! I thought you'd gone forever!" she babbled on and on about that untill Hasame poked her on the forehead, a serious look on her young features. It turned quiet. Greed was still leaning towards Temari, who looked disgusted and moved over towards Alphonse and stood behind his armor.

"ok..this is getting weird..." said Edward in the silence.

"Guess I'd better explain. I used to live in Sunagakure, and became a ninja in their world. I trained with Temari, Kankuro and Gaara, for all my life. I came into their world, dont ask me how and why, and I found my brothers. I stayed there because I met someone and remained there for all that time. Im not explaining anymore." she plopped down on the grass, huffing.

"But, looks like id better introduce you...again. Everyone, Tsunade and Shizune and Ton Ton the pig. This is Roy, Greed, Envy, and Alphonse and Edward, my brothers. There, now. does any one know if there are going to be any mo-"

A large black and white dog suddenly came pounding over towards Hasame and began licking her face, covering it in dog slobber.

A woman with blonde hair in a clip and the same uniform as Roy stomped over and began scolding the dog.

"Black Hayate, osuwari! When I say Heel, i mean HEEL." she ordered, and looked up. She saluted the alchemists and they did so back.

She cocked an eyebrow at the strange group. Hasame went berserk.

"More people...Argh! Fine. Everyone, Riza Hawkeye. Lieutenant, meet Sakura, Sasuke, Naruto, Tsunade-sama, Shizune, Temari, and Ton Ton. there. Now, if there's anyone else that arrives, I'm making you in charge Colonel! Got it?" Hasame planted her hands on her hips, daring anyone to oppose her. Roy jumped and saluted the girl as if she was of higher rank than him, which was definitly not true. Hasame grabbed Envy's hand and stormed out of the group. It was great seeing all them again, but today was not the greatest time. She scanned the park for a quieter spot for them to enjoy.

Out of the corner of her eye, Hasame spotted a square box, amaturishly camouflaged to look like a rock, and it was following her and Envy. The red head sighed in frustration. Envy looked at her in confusion. She tilted her head to the 'rock', and just as he was about to turn his head, she grabbed his chin.

"Dont let him know I know. It's Konohamaru. He was the 3rd's grandson. The little kid really wants to be a ninja, and he's in the academy. I dont know if he is a ninja yet, but, by the looks of it, not yet." She whispered. Envy cocked an eyebrow.

"Ok. But, why is he in a box?" he asked.

Hasame stiffled a laugh.

"it's supposed to resemble a rock. But, hes not that good. So, lets just act like we dont know he's there." smiled Hasame, and intertwined her fingers with his. They walked for about ten minutes, when suddenly the 'rock' jumped in front of them and out popped the brown haired boy, his front tooth was there and had a complete set of teeth this time.

"Ha! I got you! You never knew I was behind you all this time!" He announced triumphantly, grinning widely. Hasame faked a surprise look on her feminin features and laughed, mussing up his already messy hair.

"Hasame!" he cried and hugged her around the waist.

"Hey Konohamaru! You sure scared us." She said, nudging Envy in the ribs.

"Oh yeah. I nearly died of fright." he said in a monotone voice, raising his eyes to the sky.

"Your getting better at your stealth skills, little guy." Hasame praised and Konohamaru smiled and let go of her.

"Wanna play with me? I want you to teach me some more! I've forgotten all youve taught me since you left. Pleaase?" the little boy insisted, jumping up and down, and tugging on her black skirt.

Looking over at Envy, Hasame asked him with her eyes.

"Oh fine. go ahead. I'd like to see this also." he agreed, and stood back.

"Ok, you go hide, and I get to find you by stealth, got it? then you practice on me, ok Konohamaru?" She instructed the brown haired boy. He nodded furiously and dashed into a nearby forest. Envy followed and saw Hasame jump into the trees and dash off. Envy searched for the boy, and surprisingly couldn't spot him. It was very quiet for a while.

'Wow..that boy's good.' he admitted in his head, yawning.

Suddenly, Hasame appeared out of nowhere with Konohamaru slung over her shoulder. The boy was whining, saying it was unfair.

" Ok now, remember how I did it, and try doing it to me." she said, squatting down to his level. She touched his nose and smiled, then a blur of red and she was gone.

"Aw man! This is gonna be hard! I never find her." compained Konohamaru and scratched the back of his head. He climbed a tree like a monkey and looked around for the girl above.

A soft voice echoed through the trees.

"I'm over heere." it said, teasingly. It came from his left and the boy cried out in triumph, and landed down in a bush.

"I got you! Hey...theres no one here." he said, looking around the area where the voice had come from.

"Not theere...Heeere. I'm over heeere." it said softly, gently rustling the leaves and Envy's green hair.

Something brushed gently on his back and he turned around quickly, just in time to see silvery blue eyes sparkling with mirth and amusement.

I hope u read all this...well, if ya did, then youd be reading this...but you couldve just skipped to the bottom of the page and be reading this now out of curiosity what crap im writing now. I put myself as a ninja cuz in one of my stories, Hasame (again) is in a fanfic with Gaara and shes a ninja from...er...well, ill make her from Konoha so, i used that. And if any of you have read my little notice in the story Save Me, then you should know I call myself the Whisper Alchemist. Nothing fancy, read the notice and youll know why i call myself that, blah blah blah...ANYWAY! REVIEW PLEASE! i dont care if u say my story is beyond OOC and that my character is a fuckin Mary Sue, cuz i cant think of that as a flame if i dont even fuckin KNOW WHAT IT MEANS! Either EXPLAIN it or quit saying Danis a fuckin MARY SUE! GOT IT? im sick of it and want to delete everyone who calls Dani a Mary Sue, but i cant...which sux ass. so STOP SAYING THAT OK? So, plz review and I hope you say nice, non flaming, non-MARY FUCKIN SUE, stuff (cuz ppl, Hasame is me, Me is Hasame. no fuckin duh.) ok? I know I can depend on xGAARAOFTHEDESERTx to be like, the first one to review, cuz he my bestest buddy in the whole wide world! yup yup yup! and read his story, Gaara and Hasame, love or not? cuz its good


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